The Gap vs The Gain – Why Many Entrepreneurs Are Unhappy
I just finished reading a book that honed in on why so many entrepreneurs are unhappy and what to do about it. If you want to experience more happiness, greater confidence, confidence and more success, you've got to hear this.
Hi, I am Tim Fitzpatrick with Rialto Marketing where we believe marketing shouldn't be difficult, all you need is the right plan. Thank you so much for taking the time to tune in.
Every once in a while, a book just catches us at the right time or the message in it just resonates with us at our core. And that is what The Gap And The Gain by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy recently did for me, another entrepreneur gifted this to me. Totally unexpected. Honestly, I barely know the guy. We've done business with them and get an email saying, "Hey, you've been gifting this book through Amazon Kindle." I was like, "Cool. Thank you so much."
So I decided to read it and it was fascinating. Awesome book. And I want to share some of the principles in this book with you because I think there's so many people myself included that can benefit from this message. So if you like what I talk about today, highly encourage you to go grab the book The Gap And The Gain by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy.
So the authors start the book talking first about why many people aren't happy, and they reference Thomas Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson was the one that popularized this whole concept of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And the authors argue that is the wrong approach completely, because if you think about the meaning of pursuit or pursuing something, it implies that you don't have that at that point. You want it, but you don't have it. You're chasing it. You're doing what you can to try to get it. And their whole premise is, look, happiness should be the starting point. We should be starting with happiness, not pursuing it because we're pursuing it, we don't have it, and we're always going to be chasing it. And that is why so many people aren't happy. And that's where they introduce this concept of the gap and the gain.
The gap and the gain, having an awareness about the gap and the gain, that's the tool that is going to help me, you have more happiness, greater confidence and more success.
Here's the basics of the gap and the gain. You've got to think about, there are two ways you can measure yourself. One is going to empower you. The other is not. We all have a starting point. It's where we started from. Above that, you've got this point of what you've achieved thus far in your life or the project. Whatever you're looking at, you have a starting point and you have a point where you are right now, which is what you've achieved. Above that, you have an ideal, an ideal that we are all chasing. The ideal, what they talk about here is ideals are like horizons in the desert. They're immeasurable unreachable and constantly moving. You're never going to get there. Never going to get there. So the only purpose that ideals serve is giving us direction for setting measurable and achievable targets. That is the only purpose that they have.
The problem we all fall into at times, some of us more than others, is we find ourselves in the gap when we are looking at what we've achieved and comparing it to this ideal that is in our head. And remember, the ideal is something that we're never going to achieve. So we are measuring ourselves forward, not backward. When we do that, we are in the gap and we are never going to be happy because we're comparing ourselves to something that is not achievable. That we are never going to reach. That is a losing battle. And what the authors argue is that what you need to do instead is get in the gain and you are in the gain, when you're actually measuring yourself backward. You're looking at where you started and comparing it to what you've achieved. And look how far you've come. That is a much more empowering place to be. So measure backward to where you've started to what you've achieved instead of looking at what you've achieved and comparing it to this ideal that you're never going to reach.
So that's the whole concept of the gap and the gain and none of us are immune to this, we all find ourselves in the gap at times. The key, at least that I pulled from this is we need to have the awareness to know when we're in the gap, catch ourselves so that we can shift it, and get into the gain. And the faster we can do that, the better off we're going to be. The more we're in a place of gain, the better we're going to be. So none of us are immune to going into the gap. But some of us are much better about identifying that we're in the gap and getting out of it quickly. That's the power in this book, in my opinion.
So let's talk about some examples, and these are all examples from the book of Gap versus Gain to really just hammer this point home. So let's think about the gap first. You are in the gap when you focus on what you lack. When you focus on what you lack, you are in the gap. When you compare yourself to others, you are in the gap. When you focus on what could have been or should have been, you are in the gap. When you blame others, in other words, when you're not taking responsibility, you are in the gap. When you see things happening to you rather than for you, you are in the gap. And mind you some of these things, I'm not saying these things are easy. They're not. It takes work. But these are all great examples of being in the gap. When you care what other people think about you, you are in the gap.
Let's look at the reverse. What about the gain? You are in the gain when you focus on what you have. Focus on what you have, not what you lack. I hope you're starting to see these comparisons, how they fall into place. Where you start to what you've achieved, you're in the gain. If you're comparing what you've achieved to an ideal you'll never reach, you are in the gap. When you focus on yourself, you are in the gain. You're not worried about what other people think. You don't care. All you can control is yourself, and that is what you're focusing on when you value your experiences, all of them positive and negative, or you are in the gain, excuse me. When your life is based on your actions and your results, you're in the gain. When you take ownership and responsibility for your actions and where you are at this point in your life, you are in the gain. And when you are grateful you are in the gain. There are so many other examples in the book from comparing when you're in the gap and when you're in the gain. But I hope this is giving you an idea and at least a base understanding of this concept. I think it is so powerful and we can all benefit from it because the more we're in the gain, the better off we're going to be, the more successful we're going to be, and the happier we're going to be. And I think one of the common things as entrepreneurs is, I know I've done this, I haven't talked to a single entrepreneur that doesn't do this at one point or another, it's like, "Hey, I'm going to be happy or I'm going to be satisfied when?" So we're in the gap at that point and we need to get into the gain.
So if you like this concept, it resonates with you. Go check out the book. It's a great book. Again, The Gap and the Gain by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Check it out. I hope you found this helpful. I loved this book. I think you will too.
Thank you for tuning in. Again, I am Tim Fitzpatrick with Rialto Marketing. If you are running into roadblocks with your marketing, you're not sure what that next step should be for you based on where you are and where you want to go, we can help. Go to our website, Rialto Marketing dot com. R-I-A-L-T-O Marketing dot com. Click on the Get A Free Consultation button. Guarantee you will get a lot of clarity from that call and know what your next steps should be based on where you are and where you want to get to. Till next time. Take care.